How To Behave In Public
A Poem By John Simone


Speak only when spoken to.
Nod in an understanding fashion.
Smile.
You don't want to look threatening.
Make friendly eye contact.
Don't glare.
But, don't squint either.
You don't want the person to sense your thoughts.
Stand upright, but not stiff.
Don't make any sudden movements,
such as an abrupt glance over the shoulder.
Such motions will attract suspicion.
Try not to tremble or sweat profusely.
If sweat appears on your brow,
mention your brisk walk or jog to the location,
then wipe your brow with a handkerchief.
Don't laugh or talk too loud.
But don't whisper either.
Don't rush the conversation.
Don't stammer.
Don't converse extraneously.
If the conversation drags on,
mention an appointment you must keep.
Use a polite conversation closing,
such as, "Well, it was good seeing you."
Then take a half-step backward.
Smile again as you turn.
Don't run for the exit.
Remain calm.
Walk slowly towards the door.
Don't look back.


Back
</html>